The Hunger Games Reviewed

*WARNING: SPOILERS*

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Violet and I finally got the chance to watch The Hunger Games. I was so psyched to see it. Action, girl power- I’m all over it. Overall, I liked the movie, but there were a few things I found confusing (and, yes, that could be because I was ravenously hungry and had to keep getting up to refill my popcorn- I’m getting my money’s worth. And when did concessions get so expensive?? I just want some popcorn and red vines, maybe a slushy, I shouldn’t have to sign over my first born. The Hunger Games, indeed. But I digress).

So delicious, so expensive
So delicious, so expensive

Apparently, it was a book first? I mean, seriously, who even takes the time to read (oh yeah, my dorky little sister. Love ya, sis!). So, that girl was getting sooooo emotional the whole time. I mean, right at the beginning, the little girl… what was her name? It was weird. I looked it up. It was Rue. That’s a weird name. That chick died real quick and Violet was in hysterics sobbing! I’m like, you knew her for 15 minutes. She said it’s much more hashed out in the book, but again, who can take the time. Also, wouldn’t reading ahead have made you more prepared, sister dear? I mean, death is right in the description.

So, here’s the thing. 24 unwilling (for the most part) kids are thrown into an arena to kill each other, right? So…. I don’t know, maybe just don’t kill each other! You could all band together, use your random skills, and just leave. I mean, who’s really going to stop you? It seems like every adult has some kind of handicap. You could take them!! So, do it! If I had directed this movie (…if I had written the book?), it would have been far more baby revolt (Note to Self: Write a screenplay titled Baby Revolt). And, yes, that kinda happens at the end, but I woulda been going strong the whole dang time.

The ending also seemed pretty open-ended, like they left it open for more movies. Is there more to the book? Does it keep going after the games end? Update: Violet has informed me there are actually more books, so that explains that. Hopefully, they take a page outta my book (see what I did there?), and start putting some people in there place. That being said, as horrible as the capital is, that is one fun wardrobe. Ooooh! Halloween plans!!

Seeing as Hollywood did not take my genius direction on how the story should have gone, here’s what I really don’t understand. Those district 1 and 2 guys, right? They have literally been training all their lives and then v o l u n t e e r to be in the Hunger Games.

HOW DO THEY NOT WIN????!?!?!

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I’m sad they’re dead because of the…. story line

Seriously! Like, did you guys not realize just how much killing would be involved or that the other kids are actually going to try to kill you too?? They came in hot and ready, taunting and teasing, then just keel over! And Katniss, scrappy and agile as she may be, really should not have stood a chance. (And really, guys? Not one of you can climb a tree? Was that not in your training regimen as children?) It’s just not realistic.

After all that, I’d like to end on a positive note. And let’s be honest, Mystique, Thor Jr., and Shorty McShort all did a great job. I guess it does take some talent and work to really get a rise out of a viewer, right?

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